Orange County Divorce Lawyer Blog

Several media outlets, including CNN, have recently highlighted an academic paper that floats a jarring idea: the article in the Journal of the American Medical Association argues that in certain circumstances "severely obese children be removed from their homes, and that government involvement may be justifiable because of the imminent health risks and the parents chronic failure to address medical problems."

In other words, the authors argue that allowing your child to become obese is a form of child abuse, and should be treated as such by the courts.

From the perspective of an Orange County family law and child custody attorney the best that can be said about proposals like this is that they are obviously well-intentioned. Childhood obesity is a well-documented, and growing, problem in our country. Moreover, the examples cited by the authors and by CNN - a 90 lb toddler, a 400 pound 12-year-old - are, indeed, shocking. The problem would come when decisions had to be made about children who are overweight but in no imminent physical danger. The argument being made by the authors could easily be extended by analogy to eating disorders, creating an implication that California parents' rights somehow end (or are at least to be curtailed) as soon as a child is judged to have a less-than-perfect diet.

Of course it is worth noting that in an Orange County child custody and visitation case this would hardly be the first time one parent has alleged poor care as an excuse to keep a child away from the other parent. Such tactics are a common feature of suits involving California parental alienation claims.

The assistance of an experienced Costa Mesa, Santa Ana or Anaheim family law attorney is essential for parents seeking to defend their rights against shocking accusations during the especially trying weeks and months that surround a California divorce.

CNN.com: Should Parents Lose Custody of Obese Children?

Seattle Post-Intelligencer: Should Obesity Qualify as Child Abuse?

A bill currently being considered by the California legislature would make significant changes to the way California child dependency hearings are conducted in the state. This crucial aspect of California family law is not widely understood, and merits closer examination.

According to Capitol Weekly, a publication focused on politics and government in Sacramento, hearings in California's dependency courts "are considered "presumptively closed" - that is, members of the public and the press are barred unless a judge feels there is a compelling reason to open a hearing up." Dependency Courts are a special sub-set of the broader California court system that hear cases dealing with the foster care system and with California child custody issues stemming from alleged abuse and/or neglect.

As Capitol Weekly notes, "the rational for having closed courts is to protect vulnerable children." But backers of AB 73, a bill seeking to make dependency court hearings presumptively open, take the view that public scrutiny is essential for preventing miscarriages of justice. The Weekly notes that there is no uniform national standard for openness in dependency courts - only in Oregon and Pennsylvania are dependency hearings always open - but that "the pendulum appears to be shifting towards more open courts" nationally, especially here in the western states. A recent opinion piece in the San Francisco Chronicle put forward the view that greater scrutiny of the dependency courts will provide an extra layer of insurance against ill-considered rulings.

Dependency courts deal with some of the toughest issues facing the California family court system. Issues like alleged abuse and neglect, parental alienation and guardianship questions. For Orange County parents confronted with the need to enter into legal proceedings being sent to a dependency court only adds an extra layer of stress to the already emotionally volatile issues of Orange County child custody, visitation and guardianship.

The assistance of a skilled and compassionate Orange County family law attorney is crucial for any parent confronted with the need to deal with the court system. Dealing with a little-known, and often secretive part of the justice system, such as the California dependency courts, is all the more stressful - and requires the best Orange County family law assistance available.

Capitol Weekly: Attempt under way to open up courts that deal with child abuse cases

San Francisco Chronicle: Impelling Foster Care Reform Through Journalistic Truth

At the time of his divorce comedian and game show host Steve Harvey was widely portrayed as the Bad Guy. Now, according to E! Online, newly released legal documents appear to paint a somewhat different picture. The story is a cautionary tale for couples going through an Orange County divorce: a reminder of the degree to which a seemingly closed case can return to make one's life difficult.

Harvey and his wife second Mary divorced in Texas in 2005 after ten years of marriage. Last month - more than a half-decade later - she took to YouTube with what E! calls a "lengthy, vitriolic" rant alleging that he cheated on her, alienated their son and left her broke and homeless. The entertainment magazine/website reports that Harvey, to his credit, refused to respond in kind, and instead went back to court seeking the temporary suspension of a gag order imposed on both sides as one condition of the couple's settlement.

The verdict is that if Mary is now destitute she clearly has no one but herself to blame. The papers document four years of support at the level of $40,000 per month, followed by a one-time lump sum payment by Harvey of $1.5 million. As for being homeless, she received three (yes, three) of the couple's homes under the terms of the agreement.

Settlement papers, of course, do not render a similarly definitive verdict on accusations of infidelity or parental alienation, but E! notes that Harvey denies both charges. He has primary custody of the couple's 13-year old son and also has three children from his first marriage, E! reports.

Harvey's obviously painful, very public, post-divorce odyssey is a reminder of the important role your divorce attorney, here in Orange County or anywhere else, long after a case, and a marriage, seem to be over. Ex-spouses sometimes return with new demands (or, like Michael Douglas' ex, Diandra, novel twists on old ones), or seek to have old issues reopened in light of changed economic circumstances. An Orange County divorce attorney's help does not stop once your case is concluded. A good lawyer will always be there to help defend a client if a bitter ex-spouse seeks to re-litigate a California divorce settlement after the fact.

E! Online: Steve Harvey Not Such a Wife-Ruining Jerk, After All

There is no question that Orange County parental alienation can be both emotional and frustrating, particularly for fathers who may come to believe that our court system does not do all it can to protect California and Orange County fathers' rights. In Florida at the moment, however, a case is playing out that offers a painful example of personal frustration running out of control.

According to a report in the Daytona Beach News-Journal, James Wardner has grown so incensed with what he believes is unfair treatment by the courts in a custody battle over his five children that he has hired protestors to picket both the county courthouse and the offices of his ex-wife's attorneys.

According to the paper, Wardner, a dentist, and his wife divorced in 2004. Since then he has seen his child support payments rise from $1800 per month to "just under $4000." During that same period, the paper reports, "he claimed in court documents that his ex-wife systematically tried to cut him out of their children's lives." He is currently involved in a legal battle with his ex, seeking either full custody of the children or a significant reduction in his child support payments. A psychologist hired by Wardner concluded the children's mother "engaged in a deliberate campaign to alienate the children from their father," - a charge she denies.

Without wanting to try weighing the merits of competing claims by ex-spouses a continent away, it does bear saying, however, that hiring day laborers to stand outside the courthouse holding signs saying (among other things): "Do not throw your $$$$ away on attorneys - fathers have no rights in this courthouse," is probably not the best way to win sympathy from either judges or the public at large.

Here in Orange County, parental alienation is a problem that can haunt fathers for years. Courts may sometimes be agonizingly slow, or seem unresponsive, but confronting them with hired protestors is not the answer. The advice and legal representation offered by an experienced Orange County fathers' rights lawyer is your best defense against the emotional trauma of parental alienation. Someone who understands your needs, and will fight for your rights, can be your most important ally when facing a contentious Orange County divorce or child custody battle.

Daytona Beach News-Journal: Father in lengthy custody battle hires protestors to vent

An Orange County Divorce can be a difficult, emotionally stressful, experience. A recent case from New York, however, can be seen as a cautionary tale: listen to sound advice from your attorneys, don't let the pressure get to you and, above all, if you feel as though you are about to crack - get some help.

The case I am referring to concerns Anthony Chiofalo who, according to the New York Law Journal, has been involved in a contentious divorce proceeding since 2005. The Journal reports that he first crossed a line when he violated a protection order a court had issued to keep him away from his estranged wife and children. Then, having moved here to California, he began sending obscenity-laced messages not only to his wife but to "her lawyer, his sons' law guardian and the law clerk assigned to his divorce case."

Chiofalo - himself an attorney - did all this against the explicit advice of his own lawyers and has now had his law license suspended for two years (a penalty that was, in fact, harsher than the censure prosecutors requested, according to the Journal).

It is undeniable that the collapse of Chiofalo's world must have been an intense and stressful experience. Divorce lawyers, however, are there to offer sound, measured advice - even when clients are attorneys themselves (Chiofalo specializes in corporate, not family, law). Even if you feel, as Chiofalo apparently did, that your case involves issues of parental alienation and an ex who is not acting in good faith, there is much to be gained by listening carefully to the advice an experienced Orange County, Los Angeles or other Southern California family law attorney has to offer.

Violating a court's order is never a good idea. Nor is confronting an ex in ways that only provides him or her with evidence to use against you as an Orange County divorce proceeding makes its way through the courts. The advice of an experienced Orange County family law attorney can be the key to obtaining justice while retaining control over the most important aspects of your personal life.

New York Law Journal: Lawyer facing divorce gets suspended for sending 'Hostile' messages

According to a report in the Orange County Register, a key hearing is scheduled to take place in Orange County Family Court today in the 'Baby Vanessa' case. As I have outlined in earlier posts here and here, this complex Orange County father's rights case involves a Rancho Santa Margarita woman, Stacey Doss, who adopted Vanessa, now age 2, shortly after the child's birth.

Doss was told by the child's birth mother that the baby was the born as the result of a one-night stand and that her father wished no involvement with the baby. In fact, the father, Benjamin Mills of Dayton OH, had an on-and-off relationship with the birth mother who had not, it emerged, told him she was pregnant. Mills sued for custody of his daughter, with Doss countering that she is the only parent Vanessa has ever known and that parting the two would be too traumatic for the child. Over the summer Mills' mother, who is raising his two other children, also petitioned for custody of Vanessa.

Now, the Register, quoting a spokesman for Doss, reports that custody negotiations between Doss and Mills "started Wednesday and continued Thursday with no resolution." The timing is crucial since, the paper notes, "a court hearing Friday will determine if mediation will continue or if the custody case will go to trial." A custody hearing was originally scheduled to take place in Ohio early next week but has, for the moment, been "put on hold", according to the paper, pending the outcome of these talks.

Orange County father's rights, custody and adoption and questions of parental alienation have all come into play in this case. All these, in turn, serve as reminders of the importance of having an experienced Orange County family law attorney on your side when undertaking any legal matter. The justice system can be complex and confusing. Cases like Baby Vanessa's, which stretch across state lines, can be especially complicated. Having an Orange County child custody lawyer in your corner is an essential in protecting your rights.

Orange County Register: Talks held in 'Baby Vanessa' custody fight

A common trend in couples going through a heated Orange County child custody battle is one parent's parental alienation of the child against the other parent. Parental alienation occurs when a child expresses unjustified hatred or unreasonably strong dislike of one parent, making access by the rejected parent difficult or impossible. The feelings of the child may be triggered by the other parent's negative comments. For example, if one parent "bad-mouths" the other parent in the presence of the child, the child will likely be influenced by that parent's negativity. This causes the child to dislike the parent being talked down upon.

Often times couples going through a divorce forget about the children involved and usually seek "revenge" against the other spouse without consideration for the welfare of the children involved. Obviously, such tactics are not in the best interest of the child. When going through an Orange County divorce proceedings, it is best to keep the children out of the situation and to keep the issues strictly between the divorcing couple.

Parental Alienation has drastic effects upon a child and in some cases, it takes years for the child to recover. You can read more on coping and recovering from parental alienation here.

For more information on parental alienation, contact an Orange County child custody attorney for more information.

Source: Parental Alienation

Are you involved in a physically abusive relationship? Has your life been threatened by your spouse? Are your children unsafe living with your spouse because he or she neglects or abandons the children? If you answered to yes to any of these questions, filing an Ex parte application may be a way to resolve your problems.

Filing an Ex parte application with a Los Angeles or Orange County court is essentially requesting that the court hear your case on shortened time (or sometimes, without notice to the other party) due to the presence of an "emergency" or "irreparable harm" situation. Typically, such ex parte applications involve child custody matters (i.e. child is in danger or has been abducted), domestic violence matters (i.e. physical abuse, violence or attack) or any matter warranting an "emergency" hearing. Pursuant to Orange County Rule of Court 704C, "ex parte relief will be granted only upon a showing of irreparable harm . . ."

As an example, if Dad discovers that Mom is abusing drugs and/or alcohol, neglecting her duties to care for the children such as forgetting to pick up the children or failing to provide them with food, clothing etc., and if Dad believes the children are in danger if they continue to reside with Mom, Dad may petition the court for Ex parte relief to obtain custody of the children.

As another example, if Husband and Wife continue to reside together in the family residence and Husband physically attacks Wife on a regular basis, emotionally abuses Wife, or threatens her life, Wife may seek an Ex parte request for a domestic violence restraining order.

If any of these situations sound familiar to you, be proactive and contact an Orange County divorce attorney for assistance.

An Associated Press article that has been republished throughout the national media this week notes a growing trend in custody cases here in California and elsewhere: claims by one spouse/ex-spouse that medical marijuana use by the other renders that person an unfit parent.

Though focused mainly on Washington state, the piece quotes a representative of a California group, Americans for Safe Access, saying "her organization has received calls about 61 such cases" over the last four years.

Southern California child custody and visitation cases are often contentious. Parents play hardball with one another over Orange County, Los Angeles County and San Bernardino child custody issues. It is often only through aggressive legal representation that accused parents can avoid situations that rise to the level of California parental alienation and maintain the kind of relationship with their children that they want and deserve. The AP article cites several instances of fathers or stepfathers reduced to limited or supervised visitation with their children because they are medical marijuana patients. These court rulings have been issued despite a specific provision in Washington's medical marijuana law mandating that authorized users "shall not be penalized in any manner, or denied any right or privilege."

As the article details, these California and other state child custody disputes tend to turn on two issues: potential substance abuse and federal versus state law. Just as a judge can take alcohol abuse into account when determining custody, despite the fact that alcohol is a legal substance, so judges in states where medical marijuana use is permitted have the ability to consider accusations by one parent that the other is abusing the drug. Beyond that lies the fact that whatever various states say, marijuana use remains a crime under federal law. Though the feds have largely chosen not to pursue such prosecutions, this fact that marijuana use remains forbidden can leave parents involved in California custody disputes in a legal grey area if they are also medical marijuana patients.

These difficult issues are the kind of problems best addressed with the assistance of an experienced Orange County family law attorney. Medical marijuana and other potential substance use/abuse issues can be complicating factors in any Southern California child custody dispute. The best way to address them is with the help of an Orange County child custody lawyer who can defend your interests aggressively and, in doing so, help you maintain the substantive, loving relationship with your children that you deserve and they need.

AP: Medical pot can cost parents in custody disputes

NBC Bay Area: Medical marijuana weighing on child custody disputes

The latest round in the continuing struggle over parental alienation and father's rights is being fought on Long Island, but contains lessons for Orange County parents battling California parental alienation.

According to a report by WCBS-TV, a Long Island judge has sentenced a woman to alternating summer weekends in jail for alienating her two daughters from their father, in the process denying him child visitation rights. On one occasion the mother also falsely accused the father of molesting one of the girls. "Right now, the children want nothing to do with me," Ted Rubin told the New York Post. According to the paper, Rubin's ex-wife Lauren Lippe was found guilty of numerous violations of the couple's joint custody decree.

The victory for this long-suffering father can be taken to heart by other fathers dealing with difficult, sometimes impossible, divorce situations. According to WCBS, Rubin and Lippe divorced in 2003. Rubin says the problems began almost immediately (the couple's girls are now ages 13 and 15), and has reached a point where they now tell him their stepfather, is their "real father".

According to the Post the judge blamed the mother for "deliberately alienating" the girls from their father. One has to ask, however, whether six summer weekends in jail is really going to change this pattern of behavior. News reports indicate that Rubin will take care of the girls while their mother is in prison, but they also create an impression of damage that runs so deep that it can hardly be undone over the course of a few summer weekends.

Here in California, where parental alienation and father's rights were debated by the legislature earlier this year, the New York case can serve as a reminder of the difficulties Orange County fathers can have obtaining justice from the court system. A Southern California father's rights attorney can be one of your most important allies in your fight for justice and the relationship with your children that you want and deserve. The court system can often seem to be stacked against fathers. An Orange County parental alienation lawyer can help you fight the system.

WCBS-TV: Ex-wife gets jail for alienating kids from dad

New York Post: Shrew ruined dream life

A recent news item from Utah presents one of the odder cases of child custody fraud in recent memory. According to the Salt Lake City Tribune, a couple are in custody after allegedly forging documents to gain legal custody of their two grandchildren: a two year old and an infant, aged only four months.

According to the Tribune, the children's parents are separated. The accused couple are the paternal grandparents. The case began to unfold in mid-February when the children left home for what their mother thought would be an overnight visit to the grandparents. She could not, however, reach them the following day. Upon contacting the police she discovered that, unbeknownst to her, a court had awarded custody of her children to the grandparents. The children continued to live with the grandparents for the next several weeks. During that time the grandparents did not allow the mother to see them. Reviewing court papers associated with the child custody decision, the mother's attorney found a document supposedly signed by the mother in which she relinquished her parental rights to the grandparents. The document was a forgery and the paper reports that the court then moved swiftly to reverse its earlier decision. In the meantime, the grandparents took the children, closed up their house and left Utah, telling neighbors they were moving to California.

Police eventually located the couple in Las Vegas where, the newspaper says, the grandmother "told investigators they would not return the children." Police eventually convinced her to reveal her location, after which Nevada child services took custody of the kids. The grandparents returned to Utah and turned themselves in.

Aside from a number of obvious How-Could-This-Have-Happened questions (such as: how did the Utah court wind up accepting a forged document concerning something as serious and unusual as a mother surrendering her parental rights to two small children?) this case - though highly unusual - is a useful reminder for all of us here in California of the importance of careful, detail-oriented representation by an Orange County child custody lawyer at the earliest stages of any Southern California child visitation and custody dispute.

An Orange County custody and visitation attorney can help you make a clear-eyed assessment of your circumstances, determining whether a developing separation or California divorce runs the risk of child abduction or California parental alienation. The earlier in the process you seek legal advice, the better the chances are that potential problems can be identified and addressed before they reach a critical stage.

Salt Lake City Tribune: Grandparents accused of forging papers to get custody of grandkids

A bill currently being considered by the Tennessee state legislature has attracted the attention of father's rights advocates nationwide, and promises to add new vigor to the debate over California father's rights.

According to a recent article in USA Today, as well as local Tennessee media reports, the proposed legislation would require judges hearing contentious child custody cases to split custody evenly between the mother and father if the parents are otherwise unable to resolve their differences. Father's rights groups across the country have hailed the initiative while, according to USA Today, "an alliance of women's groups, some judges and the Tennessee Bar Association... say the change would make divorces tougher to settle and give abusive ex-husbands leverage they shouldn't have."

The Tennessee controversy echoes the father's rights debate we are currently having here in Orange County and elsewhere in California as our own legislature considers California parental alienation legislation. It is unfortunate that some partisan voices are skewing these legislative debates by implying that Orange County or Los Angeles father's rights advocates are, by definition, attempting to protect the rights of abusers. According to a University of Memphis law professor quoted by USA Today, the proposed law would make Tennessee unique in the nation in "requiring clear, convincing evidence that one parent is unfit before dividing child custody unequally."

The immediate controversy generated by measures like these, be they in California or Tennessee, highlights the importance of having a strong California father's rights lawyer on your side during any Orange County child custody and visitation dispute. It is unfortunate, but sadly true, that many spouses will attempt to paint a biased and unfair picture of the other during an Orange County divorce proceeding. Effective and experienced Orange County legal representation is your best defense in such a situation, where a spouse or ex-spouse may be trying to press a California parental alienation claim against you.

USA Today: Tennessee moves to split custody evenly in messy divorces

WPTY/WLMT Memphis: Bill seeks to evenly split child custody in messy divorces

California parental alienation has been the subject of competing columns in recent issues of the Sacramento political newspaper Capitol Weekly. Interest in the issue has been spurred by the introduction of a bill in the State Assembly, AB 612. The bill declares California parental alienation to be an "unscientific theory" and, if adopted, would bar California family courts from considering parental alienation as part of custody hearings.

AB 612 was originally introduced early last year and began making its way through the legislative process before being set aside over the summer. According to the legislature's online bill tracking system, the first hearings on the measure were cancelled last July at the request of the measure's sponsor, Assemblyman Jim Beall (D-San Jose). The bill is not, however, dead and is scheduled to be considered by the California Senate's Judiciary Committee later this spring.

The competing articles in Capitol Weekly lay out the two sides of the issue in forceful language. The measure's supporters reject the entire idea of parental alienation seeing it, in essence, as a legal fig leaf designed to return battered children to the custody of an abusive parent.

California parental alienation advocates, however, oppose the measure. They argue that while no one favors child abuse, it is ridiculous to suggest that parents involved in contentious California divorce proceedings do not sometimes attempt to poison their children's attitudes toward the other parent.

The anti-AB 612 column in the Weekly also notes that a number of legal and judicial professional organizations have expressed opposition to the measure, including "the Judicial Council; the California Judges Association; the Family Law section of the State Bar; the California Psychological Association; the Association of Certified Family Law Specialists; the Association of Family Conciliation Courts; and numerous others." Legal and judicial organizations have voiced concerns over any measure that would limit the scope of information a judge is able to consider during a California custody hearing.

Another tale of an international child custody battle now focuses on the case of Orange County's own Andrew Ko and his 9 year old twins.

In August of 2009, the divorced father tossed around a football with his 9-year-old twins, Christopher and William, after visiting their grandmother in Newport Beach, California.
The next day, Aug. 30, he played basketball with them before their piano lesson. Their mother, Mei Wang, came by at 6 p.m. that Sunday to pick them up. Ko did the "1, 2, 3" routine with his sons: a tap of foreheads, kisses, and then hugs. "See you Wednesday!'' he told them. He didn't.

On Aug. 31, 2009, when the twins' mother was supposed to take her sons to school, Wang, 45, instead put them on a plane and fled with them to her native Singapore - defying a court order and launching her ex-husband on an international crusade to get them back.

A growing international custody battle involving a New Jersey police officer and his ex-wife, a native of the Persian Gulf island nation of Bahrain, includes a Southern California custody aspect. According to a recent report in the Philadelphia Daily News Jeff Walding's ex-wife, Deana Jahani, was living in Southern California until last summer when she traveled to Bahrain with the couple's 8 year old daughter.

International custody battles can be among the most complex, and emotionally draining, California child custody disputes. A recent high profile case pitting an American father against his Brazilian former in-laws took five years to resolve. In Walding and Jahani's case, the Daily News reports, the couple had been awarded joint custody with their daughter residing with her mother and attending school in Southern California. Last summer, Jahani took the girl to Bahrain for a vacation. Walding told the paper that his ex made repeated excuses (such as flight delays) for failing to return to the United States, before emailing him at Christmas to announce that she planned to stay in the Gulf. Both Walding and Jahani have set up facebook pages seeking to enlist supporters for their respective sides in the custody dispute.

Walding has filed a family court petition to be declared parent of primary residence. The petition also seeks to bar his ex-wife from traveling overseas with their daughter without his permission - a stipulation that, of course, would only be enforceable were Jahani to return to the United States in the first place. The paper reports that New Jersey courts denied a similar request at the time of the couple's divorce in 2007, despite Jahani having already, at that time, taken the girl to Bahrain for 10 months on one occasion. As the Brazilian case highlights, however, even winning such a judgment can be only the first step in an exceedingly long and complex legal process for a parent to win and obtain custody of a child abducted by an ex-spouse.

If you are a Southern California parent who finds him or herself in this tragic position (or fears that as a marriage dissolves you may), consulting with a Los Angeles or Orange County child custody lawyer at the earliest opportunity is imperative. Fighting for your rights in California family court can be difficult, especially for fathers. A Costa Mesa father's rights attorney is an essential ally as you navigate our complex, and often confusing, legal system. With international custody cases sometimes taking years to resolve, it is important to have a California custody attorney who will fight for you working on your behalf from Day One.

Philadelphia Daily News: N.J. dad fears custody battle is at point of no return